Text Box:

Intoxicology

Intoxicology.com

stiffcocktailparty@yahoo.com
Text Box: To alcohol… the cause and solution to all of life’s problems. Homer Simpson Text Box: Biography Name: Tyler Kent Hensley Occupation: Mixologist, Author Favorite Color: Blacked Out Favorite Animal: Boozehound Nicknames: Intoxicologist, Jägerbomber Fermented Pharmacist, Tequila Psychic I am here to give you a preview of my new book Intoxicology. Filled with more than 87 recipes, the history of alcohol, as well as famous alcohol quotes, this book is sure to intoxicate. Everyone loves a STIFF COCKtail! Buy my book now PLEASE on Lulu.com Text Box: My humble days began in a Kentucky oak shack, Now I slowly age inside of a glass house. Sad and lonely, most of my life has been spent in the bottom of a bottle. I long to touch someone’s lips, to warm their mouth, If you doubt my love, I have the proof. My appearance and aroma will tempt you, I wait patiently to be inside of someone special. I can make you laugh and also cry, I hold the whis’key’ to your heart. My short existence is running out, Consume me, Release my bottled up intoxication. My last dying moments are frozen, very cold, Touching your lips is all I’ve ever known, My days have come to an end...On The Rocks

Camping in the cold requires lots of   drinking.  Yoo-hoo and vodka are a personal favorite, easily heated in a pot over an open fire.  In the cold, smores make the perfect belly-warming treat.  This chocolate concoction has a complete campfire theme. Chocolate vodka and crushed graham crackers help build the Campfire Smores Martini.  A glow stick provides embers of the fire with dry ice  giving rise to the smoke.  The final touch is a toasty marshmallow on the side of the glass.  Dry Ice is dangerous, do not work with it naked.

In·tox·i·col·o·gy (noun) - science of raising blood alcohol content.
Text Box: Pretty women make us buy beer; ugly women make us need beer. Al Bundy Oval: The Appletini was invented by Barry Lovern at the Ardilaun Hotel in Glenard Crescent, Ireland in the late 1970’s. The Applebottomtini uses an upside-down apple for that special girl in ‘apple-bottom’ jeans.

APPLEBOTTOM

FLAVORED VODKA

Applebottomtini

Fill a mixing glass with ice

2½ oz Apple Vodka

½ oz Amaretto

                                      

Text Box: Jacked Up Fill a tall glass with ice 1 oz Jack Daniels Whiskey ½ oz Pomegranate Juice ½ oz Pineapple Juice Fill with 7up

         Apples & Oranges

                          Fill a mixing glass with ice

                          2 oz Apple Vodka

                          ½ oz Grand Marnier

 
Text Box: Honey Dew Me Fill a short glass with ice 1 oz Van Gogh Melon Vodka 1 oz Midori Melon Liqueur 1 oz White Grape Juice Shake Garnish Big Melons Text Box: Halle Berrytini Fill a mixing glass with ice 2 oz Raspberry Vodka ½ oz Chambord 1 oz Cranberry Juice Shake and strain into chilled glass Top with Champagne

Nut Shot

Fill a mixing glass with ice

1 oz Frangelico Hazelnut Liqueur

1 oz Amaretto Almond Liqueur

1 oz Coconut Cream

Stir and strain

Garnish Whipped Cream

Blowjob

In a shot glass

1 oz Bailey’s Irish Cream

1 oz Amaretto

Top with Whipped Cream

Place hands behind back

Pick up using only mouth

          

1 Tbsp ‘Black’berry Jam

‘Evenflow’ of

1 oz Lemon Juice

Shake

Garnish Lemon Yellow Sun

Dry Vermouth

Vodka

Gin

Triple Sec
Text Box: Lemon Juice Text Box: Orange Zest Text Box: Shake Text Box: Crushed Ice

Happy Hour

Martini Madness

Pearl Jam

1 oz Pearl Vodka

1 oz Tanqueray ‘Ten’ Vodka
Text Box: Strawberry Fields In a mixing glass Muddle 4 Strawberries & 4 Basil Leaves Fill glass with ice 3½ oz Gin Shake and strain Garnish Strawberry & Basil Leaves Text Box: Jägermonster Fill a short glass with ice 1 oz Orange Vodka 1 oz Jägermeister Splash Orange Juice Fill with Monster Energy Drink

½ oz Lemon Juice

1 oz White Cranberry Juice

Shake and strain into chilled glass

Garnish

Slices of Apples & Oranges

½ oz Lemon Juice

Shake and strain

Garnish

Apple Slice